“The object of a New Year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul and a new nose; new feet, a new backbone, new ears, and new eyes. Unless a particular man made New Year resolutions, he would make no resolutions. Unless a man starts afresh about things, he will certainly do nothing effective.”

     G.K. Chesterton

Looking back, my first thought was that 2023 was a bit of a wash. It felt like we survived. I worked, I lived. Most of the big or great things I hoped or dreamed of doing or being didn’t ever quite get there. (I did get my first grandchild, which is awesome and amazing!) But then I had to back up and ask about relationships in my life, the seeds of restoration in some relationships, the discovery of new friends of the heart, the gift of Lori and our love which continues to grow and delight my heart, the discovery of a renewed calling… and I find I am standing at the door looking into 2024 with more hope and anticipation than I have found in my heart in a very long time. And I am reminded that sometimes its’ not the big events, the “fireworks displays” of our lives that are the most significant or powerful. Sometimes we can look back and find it is the little moments, the daily journey, the things that are most forgetful that take us the furthest and grow us the most.

I am also reminded that much of the journey has been fueled by choices we have made to be in relationships differently. A part of our story has to do with being hurt by people we trusted. In this broken world, that’s actually a part of everyone’s story. And our response was the common one. To stay out of close relationships, to guard our hearts from getting entangled. It’s one of Satan’s most effective lies: If you stay out of close relationships you won’t get hurt. But you can still get hurt, and not have the amazing resiliency of loving people to help you walk through it. Choosing to pursue some close relationships and to allow others into our “inner circle” has had a profound impact this past year.

When God made people, he made them to house Himself. When Adam and Eve rejected his presence to chase their own desires and knowledge, they were separated from the very thing they were created for, and the whole Old Testament of the Bible is the story of that mess. They built a tent for God, then a temple 3 times over. They sacrificed animals beyond count. They had laws for the laws to make sure they kept the laws. And they failed at every step. Cause the problem wasn’t the laws. It was the big empty God-shaped space inside. When God invaded the shadow lands of this broken world he did it to restore the God-human relationship. Jesus death and resurrection made the way for our hearts to again hold his Spirit. 

Why do I go through this whole reminder? Because God lives in the hearts of his people. And when he speaks to us it is very often through those people in whom He is living. And when we separate ourselves from those people to “protect ourselves” we actually close ourselves off to God himself. We choose to eat from the tree of choice that is all about our feelings and thoughts and desires, and we reject the tree of life offered through the people of life. The life we need and hunger for comes from the God of life through the people who have embraced his life. 

So as we launch into this new year if you want to know the life of God it’s going to come from throwing yourself into the community of God. Sometimes people still don’t choose God. Sometimes it will hurt. God can and does meet us anywhere. He cares so much for us that he won’t let us just throw our lives away. But the best place where you will find the life, healing, and hope you need is in the midst of people who love and serve Jesus.

So look back and ask yourself, who are the people I have aligned my life with and around. Have they actually helped me to see, hear, and know the life of God I so desperately need? Or have they just been a part of my trying to fill the hole with something else. Then look forward into the murky waters of the future. Do you find fear or shame? Maybe catch a glimpse of bitterness? Do you feel weary cause it just looks like endless striving for one more thing to try and fill that empty place with something that doesn’t fit - chasing friends, popularity, money, religious rules, career, just trying to get that good feeling again. Anticipation for the future starts with the choices of today. There are 2 that mean everything. First, choose to chase Jesus. Ask him be the one to fill that empty place. Offer him you as a place for his Spirit to dwell. Don’t worry about cleaning up. He wants to help with that project. You just have to decide you’re good with him cleaning up. And second, go looking for His people, cause you need them, God will speak to you and reveal Himself to you through them, and you’ll find the life and family you hunger for amidst people who choose to be filled up with God himself.

This is a prayer I have offered to my Father in heaven. Maybe it will help you find your own words for the one who wants to fill you up in every way...

Father, I have spent a lot of time feeling empty over some of these past years. I have tried to fill up with work mostly, using it as some sort of drug to mask the ache and loss in my own soul. Things have not gone the way I planned or hoped. My life doesn’t look like I thought it would or wanted it too. But somehow today you have reconnected my heart to You, grown my perspective, kicked the sides in on some of my pride. You’ve been fixing up your room in me. You’ve done a lot of work from the inside out. But you’ve also used a bunch of your faithful family to speak to me from the outside in. Thank you! I’m all yours and all in. Can’t wait to see where you take us this year!